Love. Love. LOVE.

This year has been a rough year. Lots of ups and downs and turn me arounds. Carl and I have contemplated all kinds of life changes - owning rental property, buying our own house, building our own house, working less, working more.

Throughout all of the drama and craziness, love prevails. Our love for our children and the lives we lead have gotten us through the rough patches. We still have a lot of decisions to make about our future and where we are headed, but for now we are content. Our little family is complete. Savannah and Luke have two parents that love them more than anything else in this world. They both see us working hard to provide for them. They are learning the value of earning a living. They are watching us grow as adults. They are able to see that while I am their mama forever, I am also an individual that is successful and happy with my career. I have the ability to do both. During the day they are able to bond with their grandmother - and I often have adorable phone conversations with Savannah (usually daily, sometimes bi-daily!). Carl and I are able to provide love, care, and comfort to our children...with the occasionally frivolous indulgence.

I love my kids - but I also realize that in 15 years (GASP!) Savannah will be moving out...soon to be followed by Luke. Who will I be then? Once my kids were born I went from being "Michelle" to being "Savannah's mom"...but who will I be when my kids are grown? That thought has been on my mind a lot recently. I want to be a person who loves where I am in life. I want to be someone my kids can confide in and appreciate. I want to become a friend, confidant, and mentor for Savannah and Luke. While I don't want to be a friend during the raising process, I do want the raising process to nurture a relationship in which I can be a friend in the adulthood time of my children's lives. I want phone conversations with Savannah to continue.

What will be my facebook statuses in 15 years? Almost all of my timeline is filled with events and little tidbits about my kids...but there is space on there about Carl and I...or even my career. I love, love, LOVE my kids. But I also love Carl. And myself. And who I dreamed of being when I was a child. I want to nourish those things as well.

So regardless of where my life leads me, my love for my kids can never be (and should never be) questioned by anyone else. I love them and want them to dream big and succeed. But if I don't also dream and achieve goals, aren't I then ignoring my own mother's dreams for me?