The day is coming near where Carl and I will be "husband and wife" for a week instead of "dad and mom"...and I am SO very excited!!
I have a feeling Savannah is pretty excited too. I told her that while we're away she is going to get a little present each morning we're gone. (I bought items at the Dollar Store like a new Hello Kitty toothbrush, princess stickers, candy, etc.) Since then she has been eager to help me pack. When I told her I didn't know what else I needed, she said "Keep thinking." Every morning since that day she has asked me (as I get ready for work) if I am going on my trip yet. So I suppose she is content to stay with Grandma and help take care of Luke.
Luke is, of course, oblivious to the fact that we are heading out for a while, but he will be fine. He is attached to me somewhat right now, but he loves his sister and she will be right there with him. He also loves Grandma and Grandpa. I know they will be fine. I've taken all the responsible precautions...insurance cards are ready, forms signed for my mom to take them to the doctor in an emergency, food is stocked up in the house, emergency contact lists are prepared...I have finally stopped worrying about them just a little to at least begin packing my suitcase!
So it hit me today that for just a little while, Carl and I will be like we were so long ago (or it seems so long ago!). We used to hold hands everywhere we went. We'd get out of the car, fall into step next to each other, and hold hands. It is such a simple out, to hold hands...but we have fallen out of the habit. You know why? Kids! We rarely go anywhere alone together...we grocery shop as a family...so I take one kid, Carl has the other, and we just don't have the hands to hold anymore...they are full with a child.
I realize that holding hands seems to be such a small thing...but it is such a strong way to show you love the person you are attached to. You want everyone to see that you love them and they love you. It is a sign that your partner is proud to be with you, and supports you. Just the fact that we can't hold hands as often as we used to makes me feel lonely at times...I want Carl right next to me.
So while everyone says kids change marriage, they are right. Most people saying that probably don't note that hand holding...but it is one of the things I miss most. I don't miss the spontaneous nights out, the ability to watch primetime TV...I miss the ability to hold my love's hand in the grocery store...or the ability to linger next to the stove cooking with Carl holding me...now when dinner is being prepared a child is climbing on one of us, or the noise is enough to cause a headache pretty quickly...those little stolen moments alone is what I miss.
I know that eventually my kids will grow up and we will be able to shop alone together again...but that is still a few years away. So I am making it my personal mission to not allow those feelings to die just because our hands are full with children...I want to make time for the stolen moments again...it won't hurt Luke or Savannah to wait two minutes while I greet my husband at the door. It will help them to see what loving parents they have...and in 10 years when a trip to the grocery store is just the two of us instead of four, Carl and I will enjoy holding hands just as much as we did way back in high school.
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Tough Questions
I realize it's been far too long since I wrote last...but my life (which is already pretty hectic) has been on overdrive during the holidays. (Imagine that - a household with two small children is busy over the holidays!) Our Christmas was magical with both kiddos...and for once I was awake when the ball dropped to signify the end of 2012 and the beginning of 2013. I haven't been to work since December 18th...I go back on Monday. I have enjoyed my time at home with the kids. I have bonded so much with Luke in the past few weeks. I really think he is at the age that I love the most. He plays with me but isn't old enough to truly get into trouble. So that sums it up - holidays were insanely busy, but full of wonderful memories.
My gift from Carl this year was a necklace and charm from Origami Owl. I designed it, but it was his gift to me. I absolutely adore this locket...I have a representation of all four of my kids next to my heart, all the time.
Luke and Savannah have their own little birthstone child, and then the two miscarriages are each represented by an angel. The day Savannah first saw this necklace, she asked me a really difficult question. My mom also has a locket, one that has angel wings inside. My mom had told her that the wings represented all the things we loved that had gone to heaven; for instance their dog Alex. So Savannah saw the girl charm and pointed herself out. Then she saw the boy charm, and pointed out that it was Luke. Then she saw the two angels. She looked at me and said, "What are those? Like for Alex?"
At that point I had to make a decision about what to say...so I choose the most honest but gentle answer. I told her that before Luke arrived, but after she was here, that mommy and daddy had wanted more babies. God had decided to keep both of those siblings with Him before they arrived...and then we got Luke. So those are her "angel siblings". She really seemed to understand and it was a way for me to share with her the idea that she has two more brothers or sisters waiting to meet her in heaven.
For the past few months I have been really thinking a lot about the miscarriages...and that without them I wouldn't have Luke. He is the most adorable and charming little boy...and if I had carried either of the other pregnancies to term, I wouldn't have him. I cannot imagine my life without either Savannah or Luke...so although we had quite the roller coaster ride to get our two kiddos, I am so, so, so blessed.
My gift from Carl this year was a necklace and charm from Origami Owl. I designed it, but it was his gift to me. I absolutely adore this locket...I have a representation of all four of my kids next to my heart, all the time.
Luke and Savannah have their own little birthstone child, and then the two miscarriages are each represented by an angel. The day Savannah first saw this necklace, she asked me a really difficult question. My mom also has a locket, one that has angel wings inside. My mom had told her that the wings represented all the things we loved that had gone to heaven; for instance their dog Alex. So Savannah saw the girl charm and pointed herself out. Then she saw the boy charm, and pointed out that it was Luke. Then she saw the two angels. She looked at me and said, "What are those? Like for Alex?"
At that point I had to make a decision about what to say...so I choose the most honest but gentle answer. I told her that before Luke arrived, but after she was here, that mommy and daddy had wanted more babies. God had decided to keep both of those siblings with Him before they arrived...and then we got Luke. So those are her "angel siblings". She really seemed to understand and it was a way for me to share with her the idea that she has two more brothers or sisters waiting to meet her in heaven.
For the past few months I have been really thinking a lot about the miscarriages...and that without them I wouldn't have Luke. He is the most adorable and charming little boy...and if I had carried either of the other pregnancies to term, I wouldn't have him. I cannot imagine my life without either Savannah or Luke...so although we had quite the roller coaster ride to get our two kiddos, I am so, so, so blessed.
Monday, December 17, 2012
Christmas Rush
I can't believe it's been a month since I have written. I guess that is a testament to the kind of crazy life I have. (I thought it was pretty crazy before I had two kids!)
Christmas is almost here...I am SO excited. I really think I'm more excited about Savannah and Luke enjoying Christmas than I was as a kid myself! The joy on Savannah's face when she sees all the little magical presents waiting for her...I really cannot wait. Luke loves to unwrap presents. He has opened his very first two presents (ever!) recently. I really think I should just give him paper to shred, because as soon as he gets the first piece off the present he just proceeds to rip that piece into shreds and ignores the actual present. He loves the paper! We are going to have a very slow morning opening all his presents. I marvel daily about how different Savannah and Luke are...and Christmas will be just another little note in the book. Our first Christmas with Savannah was an agonizingly slow process of opening presents. She was very calculated and careful about touching presents...with Luke it will be slow again, but for entirely different reasons.
I'm excited for my time off with my kids too - two whole weeks!! I'm excited for the fun we'll have and the quality time to spend together...which is just what I'll need because two weeks after I return to work from break, Carl and I will be headed out for our cruise! I cannot believe it's almost here. I already miss my kids...but each day through this hectic time of year I'm reminded that Carl and I really need it. Our little love nest is falling apart...there's just always someone pulling a twig from here, or pulling out a branch from the other side...and we have no time to replace the twigs taken. We haven't learned to tell others no...and we certainly don't put our marriage as a priority. We tell everyone "Yes we'll do it" without thinking about us, or our family. Eventually that is going to come back to bite us on the butt...so for that one week in January, we are putting ourselves first. I hope to come back with a renewed sense of solidarity. I want to be able to respectfully say "no" to those outside of immediate family and not feel guilty. Hopefully we come back on the same page about how to handle our crazy, hectic lives.
Christmas is almost here...I am SO excited. I really think I'm more excited about Savannah and Luke enjoying Christmas than I was as a kid myself! The joy on Savannah's face when she sees all the little magical presents waiting for her...I really cannot wait. Luke loves to unwrap presents. He has opened his very first two presents (ever!) recently. I really think I should just give him paper to shred, because as soon as he gets the first piece off the present he just proceeds to rip that piece into shreds and ignores the actual present. He loves the paper! We are going to have a very slow morning opening all his presents. I marvel daily about how different Savannah and Luke are...and Christmas will be just another little note in the book. Our first Christmas with Savannah was an agonizingly slow process of opening presents. She was very calculated and careful about touching presents...with Luke it will be slow again, but for entirely different reasons.
I'm excited for my time off with my kids too - two whole weeks!! I'm excited for the fun we'll have and the quality time to spend together...which is just what I'll need because two weeks after I return to work from break, Carl and I will be headed out for our cruise! I cannot believe it's almost here. I already miss my kids...but each day through this hectic time of year I'm reminded that Carl and I really need it. Our little love nest is falling apart...there's just always someone pulling a twig from here, or pulling out a branch from the other side...and we have no time to replace the twigs taken. We haven't learned to tell others no...and we certainly don't put our marriage as a priority. We tell everyone "Yes we'll do it" without thinking about us, or our family. Eventually that is going to come back to bite us on the butt...so for that one week in January, we are putting ourselves first. I hope to come back with a renewed sense of solidarity. I want to be able to respectfully say "no" to those outside of immediate family and not feel guilty. Hopefully we come back on the same page about how to handle our crazy, hectic lives.
Monday, November 19, 2012
Thankful Tree
As Thanksgiving approaches, I have been working on creating memories with Savannah. We have been crafting up a storm (she and I share a passion for crafts!). Tonight we finally finished up all of our Thanksgiving crafts. I'm so happy with how everything turned out, and I think she enjoyed all the little crafts and techniques we used. I was reminded of how blessed I am, and she got to think about all the things that she is thankful (or happy) for. Here's a peak at our handiwork...
Thankful Tree! - Free twigs (thanks to a wonderful friend), a vase from a previous arrangement, dirt from our garden, and a few simple craft supplies. Our family traced our hands, cut them out, then wrote what we were thankful for on them. Savannah loved this activity because it was so hands-on (pun intended!) and I loved it because it was basically free! I think this will be a family tradition to make a Thankful Tree the week of Thanksgiving. It just reminds us of the things we should be thankful for...next year Luke can help too...when he will sit still long enough!
Give Thanks - Savannah loved painting these blocks! Honestly, one of the fastest Thanksgiving projects. It took Carl all of 10 minutes to cut 10 blocks of wood from the scrap in the garage, then Savannah and I painted them in pretty fall colors. While they dried we played with Barbies, and then I added "Give Thanks" in gold paint pen. Easy, cheap, and beautiful!
Turkeys! This project was a little bit more time intensive, but not much. We sprayed adhesive inside of two of Luke's leftover baby food jars, then added glitter, then Savannah shook them up. I quickly hot glued googly eyes and a felt nose onto the front. Then Savannah and I traced her hands on several colors of felt...and then I cut a lot of hands out. I mean a lot! I wanted a very feathery turkey! Then I just laid out the felt hands in a pretty way, hot glued them together, then glued them onto the jars. Pretty simple, and again, really cheap! I love how cute them are!
We have been busy, busy this week - but I know we are making memories!
Thankful Tree! - Free twigs (thanks to a wonderful friend), a vase from a previous arrangement, dirt from our garden, and a few simple craft supplies. Our family traced our hands, cut them out, then wrote what we were thankful for on them. Savannah loved this activity because it was so hands-on (pun intended!) and I loved it because it was basically free! I think this will be a family tradition to make a Thankful Tree the week of Thanksgiving. It just reminds us of the things we should be thankful for...next year Luke can help too...when he will sit still long enough!
Give Thanks - Savannah loved painting these blocks! Honestly, one of the fastest Thanksgiving projects. It took Carl all of 10 minutes to cut 10 blocks of wood from the scrap in the garage, then Savannah and I painted them in pretty fall colors. While they dried we played with Barbies, and then I added "Give Thanks" in gold paint pen. Easy, cheap, and beautiful!
Turkeys! This project was a little bit more time intensive, but not much. We sprayed adhesive inside of two of Luke's leftover baby food jars, then added glitter, then Savannah shook them up. I quickly hot glued googly eyes and a felt nose onto the front. Then Savannah and I traced her hands on several colors of felt...and then I cut a lot of hands out. I mean a lot! I wanted a very feathery turkey! Then I just laid out the felt hands in a pretty way, hot glued them together, then glued them onto the jars. Pretty simple, and again, really cheap! I love how cute them are!
We have been busy, busy this week - but I know we are making memories!
Thursday, November 8, 2012
I'm Thankful For...
A recent trend has appeared on Facebook - posting daily what you are thankful for. I considered joining the crowd, but then decided against it. I really think it is important to be grateful. But do people want to see me update my list of things every day? Will the things that I list on the 30th of November seem less important than those listed on the 1st? I just decided to be thankful every day - November or not.
However, I am also reminded of things that I am so blessed to have in my life. My compromise? The following list of things I am thankful for...and why.
(No particular order.)
1. My God. I am blessed to have a forgiving, loving, understanding God. I am certainly not a perfect child, but I am willing to learn and follow.
2. My husband. This year has been rough. It's been busy. It's put stress on our marriage in so many ways I can't even think of them all. But I am grateful to have someone by my side, who loves me for all my nuttiness, list-making craziness, and just the insane whirlwind that I am.
3. My kids. I love my kids - more than I ever, ever thought possible. (Sure there are days I'd much rather be able to sleep and eat at my leisure...I digress.) Some days it feels like my heart will explode with so much love crammed into it. I would do anything for them.
4. My relationship with Savannah. I love that Savannah and I already love to shop together. We have shopping dates. We go to the store and browse together. We love to just be girls together. This morning I was getting ready for work and Savannah was in the bathroom with me...I had just put on a new dress (bargain price for $2 - plus shoes!). I was digging in the closet for my boots, when behind me I heard, "Mom I love it!". She kept gushing about my dress. It was just SO adorable and hilarious all at the same time. She even loves nail polish and jewelry...it is just so amazing.
5. My relationship with Luke. He is my little buddy. He certainly doesn't snuggle like Savannah (By the way - so thankful I blogged about all those cuddles with her. I miss it now!, but he is my little guy. He climbs all over me, giggles at me, grins at me. I know there will be more to our growing connection - and I know he and Carl will have a special bond as he grows up. I love that he is like his daddy, and that he is like me.
6. The bond between Savannah and Luke. If I ever, ever had any doubts about giving Savannah a sibling (and I know I did!), they are now completely erased. It is such an amazing, precious sight to see two siblings who love each other the way Savannah and Luke love each other. I snapped a photo of them playing together the other night...they both were riding the little pirate ship ride-on toy I bought for Luke when he was tiny. Savannah was just holding around Luke and he just leans into her and grins as the ride around the house. He loves her. She loves him. It is just such a magical scene when they play...you can't help but smile because of their unbridled joy. It is just something I cannot describe with words.
7. My job. I love working. I love being a mom. I love having the flexibility to be successful at work and still be present for the important times in my kids' lives. I love making a difference in the lives of young people. I love that I enjoy what I do and it provides for my family.
8. My house. This year we have considered moving...and it's heartbreaking in a lot of ways. I love our house. We have worked hard to make it just the way we'd like. I love my kitchen, my flooring, my everything! I love the basement space, the yard (although small). I love coming home to my house. I love the neighbors. I love the special feel at Christmas. I think if we do move, I will have a really difficult time leaving. I just love it. (The hill - not so much!)
9. My extended family. I am grateful for the family that helps raise my kids. My mom spends a lot of time with Savannah and Luke...and she does so much for them. I'm so grateful and blessed to have family assisting in the daily needs of my children. I know they are safe and content. I'm glad Savannah has a special bond with each grandparent. She adores them each in their own way...and Luke is learning and forming bonds too. I'm grateful for the people outside of the immediate that care for my children.
10. My church. Carl and I love our church family. We even have talked about sticking with Avery even if we move a little farther from the church building. We love the people there, we love the activities, we love the lessons learned.
11. The Avery UMW group. I am so lucky and blessed to have joined an amazing group of ladies this year. I love having two nights a month that I can get away from the chaos of my house and just fellowship with other wonderful ladies. It is so nice to plan for the future of the church and church family...to raise money to help those in need...to help teach our youth...just to be part of a group that shows compassion.
12. My car. I love my car. I love my car so much that I prefer to drive it over the newer one. I trust it. It takes me from here to there safely. I am grateful to have a safe, reliable car.
13. Avery Preschool. Savannah (and Luke soon!) is blessed to have teachers who genuinely care about her. She is learning so many skills each day she attends preschool. Her teaches are amazing at teaching her letters and numbers and shapes and colors (she can spell her name and is learning to write it, she is pre-reading)...and they are helping her mature socially. Her lead teacher has called the house to tell me little stories about her day - little insights I would never get otherwise. I get little notes about what Savannah's day was like...and she is always bringing home artwork that her teachers help her create. I am so, so grateful for her school. She is already on a path to success in whatever she picks.
14. Savings. I am grateful that Carl and I have worked hard to save money for tough times, renovations, vacations, retirement, college...just to have a little money in rough waters. I'm grateful that we have been able to do so, and that we have the knowledge to do so.
15. Health. I am grateful that Carl and I are relatively healthy. (Of course we both could eat better and exercise more!) We have been blessed to have healthy kids and live in a healthy environment.
Overall, I am grateful for the relationships and people in my life that make every day exciting and rewarding. I hope everyone takes a moment, at some point, to remember the little things that make life the amazing gift that it is!
However, I am also reminded of things that I am so blessed to have in my life. My compromise? The following list of things I am thankful for...and why.
(No particular order.)
1. My God. I am blessed to have a forgiving, loving, understanding God. I am certainly not a perfect child, but I am willing to learn and follow.
2. My husband. This year has been rough. It's been busy. It's put stress on our marriage in so many ways I can't even think of them all. But I am grateful to have someone by my side, who loves me for all my nuttiness, list-making craziness, and just the insane whirlwind that I am.
3. My kids. I love my kids - more than I ever, ever thought possible. (Sure there are days I'd much rather be able to sleep and eat at my leisure...I digress.) Some days it feels like my heart will explode with so much love crammed into it. I would do anything for them.
4. My relationship with Savannah. I love that Savannah and I already love to shop together. We have shopping dates. We go to the store and browse together. We love to just be girls together. This morning I was getting ready for work and Savannah was in the bathroom with me...I had just put on a new dress (bargain price for $2 - plus shoes!). I was digging in the closet for my boots, when behind me I heard, "Mom I love it!". She kept gushing about my dress. It was just SO adorable and hilarious all at the same time. She even loves nail polish and jewelry...it is just so amazing.
5. My relationship with Luke. He is my little buddy. He certainly doesn't snuggle like Savannah (By the way - so thankful I blogged about all those cuddles with her. I miss it now!, but he is my little guy. He climbs all over me, giggles at me, grins at me. I know there will be more to our growing connection - and I know he and Carl will have a special bond as he grows up. I love that he is like his daddy, and that he is like me.
6. The bond between Savannah and Luke. If I ever, ever had any doubts about giving Savannah a sibling (and I know I did!), they are now completely erased. It is such an amazing, precious sight to see two siblings who love each other the way Savannah and Luke love each other. I snapped a photo of them playing together the other night...they both were riding the little pirate ship ride-on toy I bought for Luke when he was tiny. Savannah was just holding around Luke and he just leans into her and grins as the ride around the house. He loves her. She loves him. It is just such a magical scene when they play...you can't help but smile because of their unbridled joy. It is just something I cannot describe with words.
7. My job. I love working. I love being a mom. I love having the flexibility to be successful at work and still be present for the important times in my kids' lives. I love making a difference in the lives of young people. I love that I enjoy what I do and it provides for my family.
8. My house. This year we have considered moving...and it's heartbreaking in a lot of ways. I love our house. We have worked hard to make it just the way we'd like. I love my kitchen, my flooring, my everything! I love the basement space, the yard (although small). I love coming home to my house. I love the neighbors. I love the special feel at Christmas. I think if we do move, I will have a really difficult time leaving. I just love it. (The hill - not so much!)
9. My extended family. I am grateful for the family that helps raise my kids. My mom spends a lot of time with Savannah and Luke...and she does so much for them. I'm so grateful and blessed to have family assisting in the daily needs of my children. I know they are safe and content. I'm glad Savannah has a special bond with each grandparent. She adores them each in their own way...and Luke is learning and forming bonds too. I'm grateful for the people outside of the immediate that care for my children.
10. My church. Carl and I love our church family. We even have talked about sticking with Avery even if we move a little farther from the church building. We love the people there, we love the activities, we love the lessons learned.
11. The Avery UMW group. I am so lucky and blessed to have joined an amazing group of ladies this year. I love having two nights a month that I can get away from the chaos of my house and just fellowship with other wonderful ladies. It is so nice to plan for the future of the church and church family...to raise money to help those in need...to help teach our youth...just to be part of a group that shows compassion.
12. My car. I love my car. I love my car so much that I prefer to drive it over the newer one. I trust it. It takes me from here to there safely. I am grateful to have a safe, reliable car.
13. Avery Preschool. Savannah (and Luke soon!) is blessed to have teachers who genuinely care about her. She is learning so many skills each day she attends preschool. Her teaches are amazing at teaching her letters and numbers and shapes and colors (she can spell her name and is learning to write it, she is pre-reading)...and they are helping her mature socially. Her lead teacher has called the house to tell me little stories about her day - little insights I would never get otherwise. I get little notes about what Savannah's day was like...and she is always bringing home artwork that her teachers help her create. I am so, so grateful for her school. She is already on a path to success in whatever she picks.
14. Savings. I am grateful that Carl and I have worked hard to save money for tough times, renovations, vacations, retirement, college...just to have a little money in rough waters. I'm grateful that we have been able to do so, and that we have the knowledge to do so.
15. Health. I am grateful that Carl and I are relatively healthy. (Of course we both could eat better and exercise more!) We have been blessed to have healthy kids and live in a healthy environment.
Overall, I am grateful for the relationships and people in my life that make every day exciting and rewarding. I hope everyone takes a moment, at some point, to remember the little things that make life the amazing gift that it is!
Monday, November 5, 2012
Decisions, Decisions
As a parent, you are cursed blessed with the ability to make decisions for your children. Most parents make lots of choices, some good, some bad. Some regrettable, some not-so-regrettable.
This story on msnbc.com made me so sad last night. One split decision, to allow a toddler a better view (how many parents out there haven't tried to get the best view for their child?) and it all ends tragically. It makes me heart hurt for that family. It is so, so sad.
As a parent, you make so many decisions...most will, in the end, seem frivolous. A lot of decisions are based on safety. What car seat? When to feed certain foods? Who can be their friend? Who will babysit? Who teaches the driving lessons? Who do they date? What boundaries are hard limits? Can they see just find from behind the glass, not above it?
Part of the parenting process is to slowly allow your children to make decisions on their own...hopefully good ones. You train them with little decisions and hope to goodness they make wise ones when it begins to really count. As a small child we allow Savannah many options, and encourage her to shape her opinions on her own...with a little guidance. For example, she has a favorite pair of Hello Kitty shoes. They are most definitely spring/summer shoes. Her first pair are so worn that they need to be thrown out...so we bought another pair, two sizes bigger. She still wants to wear them every day...even in 30 degree weather...so we are working on teaching her to make that decision wisely...she needs to wear socks. We explain that it's cold and she would want to be warm...so now she is making those choices without us prompting.
Sometimes, as a parent, you have to make decisions that you know will protect your children, but hurt your heart. You have to say "no" to lots of things...all in the name of keeping your children sheltered from trouble or horrible life situations...often parents make sacrifices for their kids...all tied to those important decisions...
**Side note - it's almost the holidays! Savannah is gearing up for one of the most fun holiday seasons yet! She is completely enthralled with all of it...I can't wait to blog about some of our crafting/present buying adventures!!!
This story on msnbc.com made me so sad last night. One split decision, to allow a toddler a better view (how many parents out there haven't tried to get the best view for their child?) and it all ends tragically. It makes me heart hurt for that family. It is so, so sad.
As a parent, you make so many decisions...most will, in the end, seem frivolous. A lot of decisions are based on safety. What car seat? When to feed certain foods? Who can be their friend? Who will babysit? Who teaches the driving lessons? Who do they date? What boundaries are hard limits? Can they see just find from behind the glass, not above it?
Part of the parenting process is to slowly allow your children to make decisions on their own...hopefully good ones. You train them with little decisions and hope to goodness they make wise ones when it begins to really count. As a small child we allow Savannah many options, and encourage her to shape her opinions on her own...with a little guidance. For example, she has a favorite pair of Hello Kitty shoes. They are most definitely spring/summer shoes. Her first pair are so worn that they need to be thrown out...so we bought another pair, two sizes bigger. She still wants to wear them every day...even in 30 degree weather...so we are working on teaching her to make that decision wisely...she needs to wear socks. We explain that it's cold and she would want to be warm...so now she is making those choices without us prompting.
Sometimes, as a parent, you have to make decisions that you know will protect your children, but hurt your heart. You have to say "no" to lots of things...all in the name of keeping your children sheltered from trouble or horrible life situations...often parents make sacrifices for their kids...all tied to those important decisions...
**Side note - it's almost the holidays! Savannah is gearing up for one of the most fun holiday seasons yet! She is completely enthralled with all of it...I can't wait to blog about some of our crafting/present buying adventures!!!
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Childish Excitement!
Yesterday Carl and I did something we haven't done in over 5 years - we booked a vacation!! A tried-and-true, no-visiting-family, not-for-educational-purposes, not-for-work, vacation!! And here's the kicker: we aren't taking the kids!
So our decision all started on Friday. I got an email from Disney Cruise Line (as I have just about every week since our ah-may-zing honeymoon in 2007) touting the latest new deal, port, ship, etc. from the DCL offerings. I of course drooled over the cruises...but then noticed an interesting deal. So I looked into it. On Saturday, I brought the topic up to Carl. He, of course, immediately thought it would be a great idea. I was still undecided. I cannot describe my love of our honeymoon trip...magical doesn't even cover it! I truly have cried at the thought of going back. So what was holding me back? The kids.
I love, love, love my kids (as evidence shows in previous posts!). But a cruise? For a not-yet-one-year-old inquisitive little boy? For a almost 4 year old little girl that will not leave my side at gymnastics (even though we have gone every Tuesday for weeks!)? I just didn't know. The cost would almost double (kids have a cruise fare too - even little Luke!). Carl and I would spend most hours caring for both littles...and not get time to spend with each other. Sure, DCL offers kid clubs (but not for Luke's age) that do allow parents to spend a little away time. But there's no way Savannah would stay with a stranger...and Luke would required a babysitter, not a kid's club. So we'd pay to bring them, then have to pay someone to watch Luke while we ate dinner (still with Savannah). We want to do two different shore excursions (horseback riding in Cozumel, Mexico through Mayan ruins and snorkeling at Castaway Cay), but the horseback riding is for ages 12 and over...and the snorkeling wouldn't go so well with two littles who don't know how to swim yet! And while DCL is good about providing time for parents to get away (even though I've gone over the drawbacks in our situation), I don't think they allow you to leave your kids on the boat while you go ashore...I'm not sure that is their policy, but I certainly wouldn't leave my kids on a boat anyway!
So to take the kids would be kind of silly at this point in our lives. They wouldn't enjoy it nearly as much as a trip to WDW...which we are going on in 2014. That is a place to take them...there's so much to do for all ages...lots to keep them entertained...and remember, at that point Luke will be 2 1/2 and Savannah will be 5 1/2...they will enjoy shows and rides and parades. The cruise entertainment options include bingo, nightclubs, movies, shows...Luke most definitely won't sit through any of those...and Savannah only would a few times...not every night.
So am I a bad mom? Traveling without my littles? I tend to think it will make me a better mom - and a much better wife. Carl and I need to get away. We have had a rough 2012...numerous trips to the hospital (for good and bad reasons)...just so much stress and responsibility has been added to our lives in the past 10 months. We need time to recharge our batteries. One thing I'm excited about? To wake up on a "day at sea" day and eat my meals when I want, read a book by the pool, watch a movie, take a nap...all whenever I want. My kids will miss me, but they will be with Grandma (and Grandpa for at least a few of those days). Carl will have his work laptop with him for random check-ins...so I can keep up with Savannah and Luke too. I know they will be safe, sound, and comfortable at home...and they will get to spend some time with their grandparents. Carl and I have learned all too well this year that time with our parents is, unfortunately, not guaranteed.
So we are excited - really excited. Our vacation in 2013 is a selfish one, but one that we won't regret. Luke most certainly won't miss the trip...and I doubt Savannah will either. We will still travel to see family in 2013...and then in 2014 we will take Luke for his first time to WDW (and Carl and I just have to eat at Be Our Guest Restaurant!!). All while still using vacation savings...I love a great deal when I can find one!!
I know I will adore my 5 nights away...and I also know I'll miss my littles intensely...but in 18 years, when both of them are out the door (hopefully they become responsible, self-sufficient adults within 18-22 years), I want to still know, like, and LOVE the man I married.
So our decision all started on Friday. I got an email from Disney Cruise Line (as I have just about every week since our ah-may-zing honeymoon in 2007) touting the latest new deal, port, ship, etc. from the DCL offerings. I of course drooled over the cruises...but then noticed an interesting deal. So I looked into it. On Saturday, I brought the topic up to Carl. He, of course, immediately thought it would be a great idea. I was still undecided. I cannot describe my love of our honeymoon trip...magical doesn't even cover it! I truly have cried at the thought of going back. So what was holding me back? The kids.
I love, love, love my kids (as evidence shows in previous posts!). But a cruise? For a not-yet-one-year-old inquisitive little boy? For a almost 4 year old little girl that will not leave my side at gymnastics (even though we have gone every Tuesday for weeks!)? I just didn't know. The cost would almost double (kids have a cruise fare too - even little Luke!). Carl and I would spend most hours caring for both littles...and not get time to spend with each other. Sure, DCL offers kid clubs (but not for Luke's age) that do allow parents to spend a little away time. But there's no way Savannah would stay with a stranger...and Luke would required a babysitter, not a kid's club. So we'd pay to bring them, then have to pay someone to watch Luke while we ate dinner (still with Savannah). We want to do two different shore excursions (horseback riding in Cozumel, Mexico through Mayan ruins and snorkeling at Castaway Cay), but the horseback riding is for ages 12 and over...and the snorkeling wouldn't go so well with two littles who don't know how to swim yet! And while DCL is good about providing time for parents to get away (even though I've gone over the drawbacks in our situation), I don't think they allow you to leave your kids on the boat while you go ashore...I'm not sure that is their policy, but I certainly wouldn't leave my kids on a boat anyway!
So to take the kids would be kind of silly at this point in our lives. They wouldn't enjoy it nearly as much as a trip to WDW...which we are going on in 2014. That is a place to take them...there's so much to do for all ages...lots to keep them entertained...and remember, at that point Luke will be 2 1/2 and Savannah will be 5 1/2...they will enjoy shows and rides and parades. The cruise entertainment options include bingo, nightclubs, movies, shows...Luke most definitely won't sit through any of those...and Savannah only would a few times...not every night.
So am I a bad mom? Traveling without my littles? I tend to think it will make me a better mom - and a much better wife. Carl and I need to get away. We have had a rough 2012...numerous trips to the hospital (for good and bad reasons)...just so much stress and responsibility has been added to our lives in the past 10 months. We need time to recharge our batteries. One thing I'm excited about? To wake up on a "day at sea" day and eat my meals when I want, read a book by the pool, watch a movie, take a nap...all whenever I want. My kids will miss me, but they will be with Grandma (and Grandpa for at least a few of those days). Carl will have his work laptop with him for random check-ins...so I can keep up with Savannah and Luke too. I know they will be safe, sound, and comfortable at home...and they will get to spend some time with their grandparents. Carl and I have learned all too well this year that time with our parents is, unfortunately, not guaranteed.
So we are excited - really excited. Our vacation in 2013 is a selfish one, but one that we won't regret. Luke most certainly won't miss the trip...and I doubt Savannah will either. We will still travel to see family in 2013...and then in 2014 we will take Luke for his first time to WDW (and Carl and I just have to eat at Be Our Guest Restaurant!!). All while still using vacation savings...I love a great deal when I can find one!!
I know I will adore my 5 nights away...and I also know I'll miss my littles intensely...but in 18 years, when both of them are out the door (hopefully they become responsible, self-sufficient adults within 18-22 years), I want to still know, like, and LOVE the man I married.
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