Surviving the Miscarriage

So it has almost been two full weeks since I miscarried. Life has gotten somewhat back to normal. I've been back to work, with some days better than others. Carl and I have been doing a lot of packing and traveling (we all leave for Alabama tomorrow - hooray!). I sometimes hate the face people give me when I tell them I've had a miscarriage. It's always this sad puppy-dog face, which always makes me want to cry. I also hate that people think I should be crying a lot...I've done my crying. I have a little girl that doesn't need me to cry. I guess I see it as my memory is full of boxes. This event in my life is in a box. I'd like to close this box and store it. There will be times I take the box out and open it and grieve. I also have several open boxes, like memories with Savannah and Carl. Those boxes are the ones I should rejoice in, and this box containing the sad memory will be there, but never in the forefront. I have been back to the doctor several times...they continue to monitor my HCG levels...and will until it is a number below 5. The last check I was at 48...so hopefully after this trip it will be back to a normal number. I really hate opening this sad box every week...I am tired of the doctor's visits, the sad faces, and sadness. I want to enjoy life and feel blessed for what I do have.